How are you, my dear ardent fans? I think I have finally realized that even how life can be pathetic and miserable, life can still be joyful and blissful as well. The problem lies in how well one can handle his or her own predicaments and how well one is mentally prepared to face any imminent agonies in life. Those who can’t usually run away from their problems by doing foolish actions such as suicide, take drugs or succumb to alcoholic liquors to ease their miseries and sorrows. These actions are just temporary relievers and won't help solve the problem. The best remedies in facing these negative feelings are to have an open-mind constantly and embrace those sorrow feelings. Sooner or later, the pain will gradually fade away and he or she will feel much better. Certainly, this immense pain is the pain from breaking up with your loved ones especially when that special person of yours started to date another person than you. Are you wondering that something had happened between Pei Wen and me? Don’t deny it. I know what lurks in your minds now. Yes, it is what majority of you assume. In fact, this happened about a month ago. It took me quite a long time to accept that heart-breaking fact and recover from the pain. It’s not easy to forsake the pain especially when you have liked that person for more than a year. Anyway, I have long foreseen such an incident would happen one day. In fact, I have also decided to just be friends with her before this incident occurred but I didn’t expect the pain to be so excruciating. Ever since the day she expressed her feelings until recently, both of us have never been intimate. Whenever we spoke to each other, it was like meeting a new stranger whom you have never seen before. May be, it was because we expressed our feelings for each other too early. May be, it was because I was too shy. May be, it was because I was not romantic enough. May be, we weren’t meant to be together. May be, she was just flirting with me actually. May be this is called blind love. She has always been complaining that I have always been shy and not doing much as a “special person” such as asking her out for a date, accompany her in class, chat with her, call her and etc. In class, I would often chat with the boys and she would chat with the girls. We seldom sit together and chat because there is nothing to chat about. One day, our head prefect had fallen in love with Pei Wen and decided to go for it. He always chatted with her, help her with her St.John’s work, buy her chocolates, cards and etc, and he even cooked spaghetti specially for her. So, finally she decided to be with him. At first, I was really depressed when I knew this fact. It was really heart-breaking and I don’t have the mood to do anything. Whenever I saw them together, jealousy would totally engross me and the pain was indescribable by words. After a certain period, I started to think positively as I knew this feeling must not continue any more because it would affect my life and study. I seek help and advice from some of my closest friends Lychee and etc. I shared with him my sorrows and negative feelings. I told him how I really felt and I felt much better after that. I realized that even if she had not dated someone else, we would break up eventually. Now, I’m glad that she finally found a person who can spend more time and appreciate her more than me. The most important thing is that she is happy and hopefully that guy would treat Pei Wen well. Even though both of us are just friends, I would still continue to have feelings for her. It's not easy to lose the feelings I have for her since Form 1. As an ending, I would like to thank Lychee. One more advice for Burnout Racer, don’t criticise so much on love during high school because you will experience that yourself one day when you found that special girl in life unless you are sterile or a neuter.
